Don't judge what I'm about to say.

Isn't it easier sometimes to shut yourself off and disregard the rest of the world?
I've come to understand that my existence is but a small and tiny one, and I'm just another person passing by in anyone's life at any point of time, and could go easily away like the wind.

Sometimes I've asked myself countless times, who are really my friends?
Are they those who are beside me all the time?
Are they the ones who can hang out with me the most?
Are they the ones I can share my problems with without holding back?

I just feel that my efforts are futile sometimes. Who appreciates it? Everyone takes it for granted. Why should I ask them out? Why should I bother?

But when I think of the times we've spent, doing something or doing nothing, I want to see them. I want to see my friends.

Eventually everyone's going to leave me anyway. I guess I just have to take it to stride.


There's just this numbing heartache that I can't describe, throbbing from within and slowly dying out.